Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
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Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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