yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
