is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
