Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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