And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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