I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
