I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize