so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
