i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize