My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
