We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
