this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Randomize