my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
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