I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize