You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize
