If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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