I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
