try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
