My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
