I want to make a zoo with you.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
