Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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