she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize