Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Randomize
