I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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