Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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