Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
