I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Randomize
