I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
sarcasm needs its own font
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
