So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
