just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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