You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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