ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
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Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
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The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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