i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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