i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
