I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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