My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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