he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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