The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize