was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
