I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Randomize