also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
do herpes really smell.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
