dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
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