So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize