Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
