no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
