I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
