i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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