This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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