I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
