Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
