Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
